In Part 1 of What To Do When You’re Having an Identity Crisis, I described being at my breaking point and feeling insecure as I struggled to figure out who I was.
God worked in my heart to show me that I didn’t need to have all the answers. As a child of God, my identity is rooted in who He is, not in what I do or what I like. Because I follow Christ, the insecurity knocking at my door can be defeated. Even when I’m struggling, God promises that I can cast all my anxiety on Him because he cares for me (1 Peter 5:7).
I talk about following Christ, but what does this actually mean?
I remember the day fairly clearly despite the fact that I had been living in a continual state of fog for months.
“I don’t even know who I am anymore,” I said as I moved a stack of posters and made myself comfortable in the chair across from my coworker’s desk.
I had gone to her office for a quick work-related question, but then lingered. I was standing there chatting before deciding that if I was going to be there awhile, I had better take a seat before my legs gave out. I was at a breaking point and longed for someone to understand what I was going through.
Some days I wake up and I literally cannot get up.
My body won’t let me.
My legs feel heavy with a tingly sensation as if they’ve just fallen asleep after I’ve been seated for a while. My hands are tingly as well, but there’s more pain, like pins and needles.
I feel like I’ve been hit by a bus.
I roll over and want to get up. But, I just can’t. Shooting pain moves up my arms and into my chest.
Frustration builds before I intentionally stop my racing mind.
I’ll be okay, I think. This is just temporary. Let yourself rest.