An Open Letter to the Friends I Didn’t Text Back

An Open Letter to the Friends I Didn't Text Back

Dear Wonderful Friends of Mine,

I think of you a lot. Often times I’ll catch myself reminiscing about the fun times we’ve had together. We may have been travel buddies, study partners, or teammates. We may have had regular coffee dates throughout college where we’d try to squeeze in a little homework or Bible reading but would end up spending most of the time talking and laughing.

You may be someone I could turn to when depression would get bad and I needed to hang out with someone who was lighthearted.

Because you’re my friend, I appreciate you. No matter what point of life we walked through together, I treasure your friendship and the times we shared.

Something I’d like to tell you, though, is that I’m sorry I didn’t text you back.

You may have texted to say hi or to check in, especially in recent months as illness has gotten the best of me. Maybe you wanted to make plans and I said I’d check my schedule and get back to you. I’m sorry if I never did.

Even worse, I’m sorry if I was the one who actually started the conversation and then when you replied back I never said another word. Yikes! Oops. Not good.

It’s really not you; it’s me.

An Open Letter to the Friends I Didn't Text Back

Some days I read a text while I’m in the middle of something and then never go back to reply when I have a spare moment. I assume this would be the usual forgetfulness we all face from time to time.

Other days I actually read your message and am doing nothing. I have plenty of time to reply, but I occasionally get this weird social anxiety. There are times when I just can’t bring myself to put the energy into replying right then even if I love and care about you so much!

Partly to blame is the illness, which can be understandable with all that happens with symptoms and treatment. I honestly don’t know from one hour to the next how I’ll be feeling. But, I also recognize that we all, no matter what season of life we’re in, can struggle with texting people back. That seems to be a common theme among many friends and acquaintances.

How often do we start our texts to people with, “I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to reply!” ???


Sometimes I weigh the options of what’s more awkward when I realize I haven’t replied to your text. Is it more awkward to text you back the moment I think about it and apologize (yet again!), or should I wait until I run into you in person and then bring up plans? Should I just wait it out and see if you try texting me again? Would it be better if we just communicated via social media?

Ehh… This whole correspondence thing can be tricky.

At the end of the day, here’s what I know: You’re my friend. I care about you. I want to connect and catch up and hang out when we happen to have the chance.

But, if I don’t text you back, I’m sorry. It really doesn’t mean that I don’t value you.

All it means is that life happened.

Thank you for being there for me. Your friendship means a lot!

Lots of love,


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